Animal Jokes, Humor, Satire And Humorous Anecdotes
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      • Rabbit And The Snake
        01/29/08
        A blind rabbit and a blind snake meet each other. Neither one remembers what kind of animal they are, so they decide to feel each other.

        The rabbit says, "You feel me first." The snake says okay, and he starts feeling the rabbit.

        He says, "Well, you have fur al

      • Alligator Warning
        01/27/08
        The State Department of Fish and Wildlife for Louisianna is advising hikers, hunters, fishermen, and golfers to take extra precautions and keep alert for alligators.

        They advise people to wear noise-producing devices such as "little bells" on their clothing to alert, but not sta

      • Get Me A Coke
        01/27/08
        On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised to see a parrot strapped in next to him. He asks the stewardess for a coffee whereupon the parrot squawks, "And get me a coke, you cow!"

        The stewardess, flustered, brings back a coke for the parrot and forgets the coffee.

      • Tough Rats
        01/20/08
        Three rats are sitting at the bar talking bragging about their bravery and toughness.

        The first says, "I'm so tough, once I ate a whole bagful of rat poison!"

        The second says, "Well I'm so tough, once I was caught in a rat trap and I bit it apart!"

      • Chess Player
        01/18/08
        A man went to visit a friend and was amazed to find him playing chess with his dog. He watched the game in astonishment for a while. "I can hardly believe my eyes!" he exclaimed. "That's the smartest dog I've ever seen."

        "Nah, he's not so smart,&quo

      • Bad Parrot
        01/15/08
        This elderly lady, recently widowed, decides to see if a pet will ease her loneliness and goes to the pet store. She decides against puppies, kitties, etc., and is about to leave the store when she hears a voice saying, "My, do you look lovely this afternoon, madam."

        She turns a

      • Two Robins
        01/13/08
        Two robins were sitting in a tree. "I'm really hungry", said the first one.

        "Me, too" said the second. "Let's fly down and find some lunch."

        They flew to the ground and found a nice plot of plowed ground full of worms. They ate and ate

      • Three Wishes
        01/12/08
        A little old lady was in the kitchen one day, washing the dishes when suddenly a little genie appeared beside her.

        "You've led a long and good life" the genie said, "I have come to reward you by granting you three wishes. Ask for anything you want and I will make it ha

      • Football game
        01/11/08
        There was this football game the big animals and the little animals. The big animals were crushing little animals and at half-time, the coach made a passionate speech to rally the little animals.

        At the start of the second half the big animals had the ball. The first play, the elephant g

      • Knows His Way To Town
        01/09/08
        There's a guy walking along a road to town with his camel. Along the way, a man stops and ask's if he needs a ride to town.

        The guy says, yeah. He hops in and the driver says, what about your camel?

        The guy said, Oh, he's ok, he know's his way to town.

      • Bear Hunting
        01/08/08
        Two men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear. He soon found a huge bear, shot at it but only wounded it. The enraged bear charged toward him, he dropped his rifle and started running for the cabin as fast as he could.

        He ran pretty fast

      • Intelligence Factor
        01/07/08
        A pair of chickens walk into a public library, find the librarian and say, 'Buk Buk BUK.' The librarian decides that the chickens want three books, and promptly gives them some. Without further ado, the chickens walk out.

        Around midday, the two chickens are back and looking qui

      • Fire Dog
        01/06/08
        A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmation dog.

        The children started discussing what the dog's duties might be.

        "They use him to keep cro

      • Adopted Turtle
        01/05/08
        Deep within a forest a little turtle began to climb a tree. After hours of effort he reached the top, jumped into the air waving his front legs and crashed to the ground. After recovering, he slowly climbed the tree again, jumped, and fell to the ground.

        The turtle tried again and again

      • Driving With Penguins
        01/04/08
        A police officer sees a man driving around with a pickup truck full of penguins. He pulls the guy over and says: "You can't drive around with penguins in this town! Take them to the zoo immediately."

        The guy says OK, and drives away.

        The next day, the officer se

      • Real Life Animal Laws
        01/02/08
        It is illegal for hens to lay eggs before 8 am and after 4 pm in Norfolk, Virginia.

        Ducks quacking after 10 pm in Essex Falls, New Jersey are breaking the law.

        In Quitman, Georgia, it is against the law for a chicken to cross any road within the city limits.

        In Mc

      • Talking Parrots
        01/01/08
        A lady approaches her priest and tells him "Father, I have a problem. I have two female talking parrots, but they only know how to say one thing."

        "What do they say?" the priest inquired.

        "They only know how to say, 'Hi, we're prostitutes. Wan

      • The Psychic And The Frog
        01/01/08
        A frog telephones a Psychic and is told, "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you."

        The frog says, "This is great! Will I meet her at a party, or what?"

        "No," says the psychic. "Next semester in

  • 2007